Brought down by betatude

Governor Blinky (thanks, Max) has called it quits:

Democratic officials are telling The Associated Press that New York Gov. David Paterson is not seeking election.

Democratic officials in Washington were informed of Paterson’s plans early Friday. The officials spoke on the condition of anonymity because Paterson had not publicly disclosed his plans.

So what caused our good friend Paterson to change his mind? The executive summary of the much-ballyhooed New York Times tell-all piece published on Wednesday:

Last fall, a woman went to court in the Bronx to testify that she had been violently assaulted by a top aide to Gov. David A. Paterson, and to seek a protective order against the man.

In the ensuing months, she returned to court twice to press her case, complaining that the State Police had been harassing her to drop it. The State Police, which had no jurisdiction in the matter, confirmed that the woman was visited by a member of the governor’s personal security detail.

Then, just before she was due to return to court to seek a final protective order, the woman got a phone call from the governor, according to her lawyer. She failed to appear for her next hearing on Feb. 8, and as a result her case was dismissed.

And…that’s it. No bribe-soliciting, no hooker-banging, no blow-fueled swinger parties at the Executive Mansion. Just a chick who got roughed up by a flunky and was “convinced” by the Big Man to not seek justice. THIS was the unpublished story that His Excellency spent the past month PMSing over? AAAAACCCCCKKKKK!!!!!

If Paterson resigns (god forbid – do you really want to see Governor Richard Ravitch?), the Empire State will set a record as the only state to have two governors in a row felled by their own inherent betatude. I heart NY?

For further reading, check out J. DeVoy’s analysis of the scandal, in which he both gives me props and claims the reason why David Johnson’s victim was AWOL at her hearing was a sudden attack of the gina tingles:

The Times gives too much credit to this nameless victim.  She may have simply forgotten to show up at her hearing.  Or, from a more taboo angle, she may have never wanted to attend it.  Although she claims not to have seen Johnson since October 31, her reptilian hindbrain, overriding her grrlpower programming, may be responsible for the proceedings’ end.  Even the most attractive women will pair up with losers and degenerates if it makes her tingle.  Rihanna defended Chris Brown even after he pummeled her, despite their brief separation.

Hey, it wouldn’t be the first time someone in state government inspired lust through domestic violence…

Tagged as: David Paterson, J. DeVoy, New York